A Plea for Art in Public Schools

    Creating has always been a therapeutic experience for me, a coping mechanism. For as long as I can remember, I've been drawing, making, cutting, pasting--creating. Art allows me to take my energy and emotion and channel it into something beyond myself.  

    I have been creating as an "artist," since middle school. When I was about twelve, I did all of my art in black and white or plain gray pencil. I was afraid to express myself in color. I was afraid to mess up my work. I was afraid to live vibrantly. I was also in a deep state of depression which can account for my choice of medium.

    Now, I am at a better place in my life. My art is full of color and whimsy. It is full of quotes, flowers, metallics, and happiness. It's a different time. A new type of art for me. A different stage if you will. Picasso had his "blue period," and I had a gray period. And I still have my gray days.

One of my most recent hand lettering projects

    Art is so beautiful, messy, weird, and fascinating, and it is dying in our public schools. How are kids supposed to express themselves in ways that they never expected? How are they supposed to dream and wonder? We must keep art in our public schools to give young people an outlet to communicate without saying a word. Art is powerful and has the ability to change lives. Children need to be exposed and immersed in it during their education experience in order to learn and grow as humans.

A page from my high school Narrative Project

    For me, art class was an escape. An escape from the chaos around me. A place where I could just focus and learn. I could listen to Nora Jones and the Red Hot Chili Peppers while I cut and pasted magazine pieces into the negative space of my still life. It was my favorite part of my day. However, the quality of art education that I received beyond middle school is not what I would call education. The classrooms were messy, unorganized, and the teachers didn't teach technique, style, or even art history. They didn't teach at all. The supplies were few and far between or ruined due to lack of care. Once I was in college, I was given the opportunity to take an Art Appreciation class taught by a teacher with so much passion. She talked about art in a way that allowed me to devour it, and I was utterly amazed. I will never forget her giving me that experience. 

A page from my Narrative dedicated to
Warhol

    Art has helped me through the bad, it has allowed me to shine through the good, and it has given me a voice when I was too afraid to speak. Art is so important. I will never stop, and we must make sure that the next generation is exposed to it. Without art, the world is lackluster. Without art, the world's beauty and future voices are stifled.

    My first love in the art world was Claude Monet with his water lilies and Paris landscapes in middle school. Then, came Andy Warhol with his bold use of color and line in high school. After that, I discovered the likes of Yasumadsa Morimura and his self protraits and Maria Abramovic in The Artist is Present in college. Now, I'm in love with the typography of Kimothy Joy.  I will always be a viewer, appreciator, and creator. 

    Art has influenced my way of thinking and my view of the world. It has shaped me as a person. I hope my children and their peers can say the same. Do what you can to save the fine arts in our public schools by writing your local school board a letter, by donating to Americans for the Arts, or by directly donating to your school's art program.

Here are a few pieces of my art--a now and then if you will.

Two of my latest hand lettered pieces

Three of my paintings from 2016

Two of my very first collages created at least 12 years ago

Thanks for reading! Don't stop creating!

Stacy

Because They Can!

Let's talk about this video:

   To preface my critique of this video, let me first give you some background info. on the narrator. This is Mayim Bailik, and she is most widely known for playing Blossom. She also has a PhD in neuroscience and stars as Amy on the Big Bang Theory--one of old media's most problematic television shows.  Back in the early 00's, she appeared on TLC's What Not to Wear which is where I first encountered her. This show definitely contributed to my poor body image growing up as I am sure it did for many other young girls, but I digress.

    This video discusses some hot button issues for me: plus sized representation, sexuality, and female empowerment. Her opinions greatly differ from mine, and everyone is entitled to their views even if they are conservative like Mayim's. However, where my issue lies with this particular video is the way she contradicts herself. When we are talking about smashing the patriarchy through feminism and how we educate our young girls, then we should actually aim to let young girls and women make their own decisions about their bodies and their sexuality and support them in their choices. In this video, she definitely misses the mark by saying that empowering yourself through showing skin is wrong. People can choose to empower themselves ANY way that they want.

  There is nothing wrong with being plus sized.  There is also nothing wrong with being skinny.  And for the love of all things holy, THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH SHOWING YOUR SKIN if it is your choice to do so.  It is your body, and you can do whatever you want with it. If you choose to be modest, then that is your choice, and I applaud you for taking claim of your body. However, if you have arrived at this choice because this is what you have been taught, but you have never truly questioned why you choose this for yourself, then self reflection is needed.  Some days, I choose to show more skin, and other days I wear a cardigan because my old demons are whispering in my ears. It has taken me years to quiet these demons, and I will not let someone tell me what I can and cannot do with my body. Someone who judges others based on their personal body choices is not a role model that I want for my future students or my children.  

   We should be educating girls and boys on consent, body image, representation, and empowerment, but by no means should we be attempting to control their thoughts.  We need to leave room open for discussion around these issues, point them toward well researched resources, and let them arrive at their own conclusions. My conclusion here is that Mayim is extremely misguided when it comes to what makes a good role model for young girls and boys. For me, a role model should be inclusive, supportive, and empathetic. This video lacks these qualities and isolates those with differing opinions with the mocking segment at the beginning. As much as I respect her as a female leader in the STEM community, this video is problematic at best.  As Kimothyjoy communicates in this image, "We fight patriarchy not each other." We need to respect each other's choices if we are going to enact change.

To answer Mayim's initial question, why is everyone getting naked? BECAUSE THEY CAN, MAYIM.  Because they can!

What are your thoughts on this video? Please share in the comments.

Thanks for reading,

Stacy

Unsolicited Pregnancy Comments

    Being pregnant is hard!  Your body is making a tiny human(s) for goodness' sake! It is hard on your mind, your relationships, and your body especially. I have spent the better part of the last two years as a pregnant woman. Pregnancy has had its ups and downs in my book. One of the biggest annoyances were all of the unsolicited comments hurled in MY direction by strangers and acquaintances. The same can definitely be said of being a mom too-- the comments and advice never stop! Make someone's pregnancy a little easier, and think before you speak.

    When I was pregnant with my first son, I got the run of the mill comments. "When are you due?" or "What are you having?" But with my second pregnancy, the comments became much more intrusive and outlandish the bigger my twin belly grew. 

    From the time I was about three months pregnant with my twins, I actually looked about six months pregnant. I was carrying two babies, so this was to be expected. Once, my husband and I were at a Starbucks in a Target, and the barista asked me when my due date was. She said, "I bet it's coming up pretty soon, and you're ready to be done!" This was November of 2016, and my boys were not technically due till the coming May. No, random barista! I am not giving birth soon. But thanks for reminding me how big my belly looks, and how I am in fact not giving birth anytime soon. Not that it was any of your business anyway. Now, if you don't mind, I need to go pee like a race horse, so I can browse the Target Dollar Spot in peace before I get too tired to walk, my ankles swell, I have to pee yet AGAIN, or I get hungry.

    Another time my husband and I were at Target, --look, I know I go to Target a lot-- we had made it to the check out with no comments! Whoo hoo! Well, this was obviously too good to be true. The checker asked "What are you having?" I responded with, "Twins." Then another lady in the next lane pipes up and says, "Twins! I keep running into people having twins. Is this your first pregnancy?"  My husband and I lost our first son to stillbirth, so this question is particularly painful for us. I of course told her that it was not, because I am not in the business of denying that my other son, Finnley, did in fact exist. She replied, "That's so great that means you will have a little helper at home!" This comment cut me straight to the bone. I nodded politely, because I was flooded with emotion. My husband quickly shuffled me away. Then, we went back to our white Ford Escape that we bought as a family car for our first son and cried. He never got to ride in that car.

    Another instance happened at a baby shower for a good friend. I got the usual, "What are you having?" from my friend's grandmother. I told her, "Twin boys." She said, "Oh my gosh, I am so sorry!" Sorry? You're sorry? I'm not. I am so thrilled and happy that I could burst to be having two beautiful rainbow babies is what I thought to myself. I politely told her that we were very excited for our boys, but it hurt nonetheless. 

    What I am getting at here is that you NEVER know what a stranger or acquaintance is going through as a pregnant person. It's probably better to avoid intrusive questions and comments altogether. The woman you're intruding on could be suffering or healing from a loss, like myself. She could have body dysmorphia and be having negative thoughts about her appearance. She could have spent years trying to conceive and does not want to hear how much you think she can't wait to be done with her pregnancy. She could have been raped by her boyfriend or a complete stranger and doesn't know how she feels about being pregnant. You don't know! So, please I beg of you think before you speak to a pregnant woman. We are emotional and hormonal, and we could use compassion over intrusion.

   To end this on a lighter note, I will leave you with some tweets from comedian  Chelsea Peretti that inspired this post.

My personal favorite. 

Thanks for reading, 

Stacy

I Remember

    You can't hate yourself into loving yourself. I wish someone would have emphasized this to me when I started having body image issues at the age of 8. This one goes out to all the mean girls--especially to the biggest mean girl of them all, myself.

    I remember being 8 years old with long brown hair in a blue floral bikini at the Chandler Park pool on a scorching summer day. I remember going up to my mom asking for a quarter for the pop machine, so I could get a can of Dr. Pepper. And I remember the lady she was talking with saying, "Oh, this is your daughter! She's so skinny and tan. She could be a little model." I was a normal, 8 year old girl in a bathing suit who had never given much thought to her weight or appearance and didn't quite know how to receive this "compliment." This moment. This exchange is what I feel all of the issues with my body image come back to. Where they're rooted. It's weird how one second the world is innocent. Then, all of a sudden you become self aware, hyper aware, critical, and insecure. It's funny; I don't even remember this woman--really remember her.  I can't even picture her face, but I remember her words. Words stick with you. Words have power and weight. As Maya Angelou once said, "Some day I think we will be able to measure the power of words. I think they are things. They get on the walls. They get in your wallpaper. They get in your rugs, in your upholstery, and your clothes, and finally in to you." The words got to me.

    The first person that I heard use negative language toward their own body, specifically, was my Momma. My Momma is tall and fair skinned. She has bouncy blonde hair that can often be found swept up out of her way. Nothing gets in my mom's way. Not even her hair. She is brown eyed and long nosed. She wears her jewelry like a badge of honor never going anywhere without it. She would look naked to me if I ever saw her without at least one set of earrings, a necklace, and two rings on. She likes jeans, white tennis shoes, hoodies, fuzzy socks, and flouncy blouses. She is my mother. She is strong and beautiful.

My beautiful Momma

    I idolized my mother growing up--I still do. For many girls, they learn self loathing from the women that raise them or just women in general. Whether it be consciously or unconsciously. My Momma is a beautiful strong woman who uses her body every day to work, move, and help people--to help herself, family, and customers. But, I can remember that strong woman being broken down in a dressing room staring at the number or letter(s) on the label of a piece of clothing. I remember. We have all been this woman.  Why do we, strong women, do this to ourselves? 

    I, of course, don't blame the women in my life for thinking of themselves negatively. I don't blame them for it rubbing off on me. I blame society's rigid ideals of women. I blame the magazines, tv shows, and movies. I blame the media. Now, don't get me wrong. I don't dislike all things to do with society and the media--though it may seem that way considering my constant outcry for change. But, the way women are discussed as fragile and delicate (which it is okay to be), and the way women's bodies are discussed and treated, particularly, are the issues that get me fired up. Females are strong as hell. We are so much more than our jean or shirt size. We are moms, teachers, helpers, doers, artists, coaches, lovers, fighters, and so much more. We are women. 

Art by me, Stacy Hall. Quote from the Unbreakable
Kimmy Schmidtt

    I can recall being about 10 or 11 sitting in my mom's beaten down maroon Nissan outside of the Dollar General gaping at the town's homecoming issue of the paper. Staring at the homecoming court and just crying. Crying my eyes out, and telling my mom, "I'll never be one of THOSE girls, will I Momma?" 

    I remember being in the bathroom in 8th grade and having a group of girls tell me, "I wish I could be as skinny as you, Stacy." While when I looked in the mirror, I saw a distorted image of myself.  What they didn't know was that I was too sad to eat. I could control my eating; I couldn't control my surroundings.  

    I can recall being in the 9th grade sitting by myself at lunch eating nothing, being a hundred pounds of skin and bones, writing in a journal while I tried to avoid the eye contact of everyone around me. I remember my Momma being so scared running into the bathroom when I choked on my toothbrush brushing my tongue thinking that I was throwing up what little food I ate. I never did throw up for the record. 

    I can remember sitting on the white and purple floral duvet cover of the extra long twin bed in my dorm room Sophomore year while two of my "friends" sat in the floor and discussed how they had both eaten two cookies today, and they couldn't believe how fat they felt. I also remember them making fun of the size XL shirts they found at Walmart that they said fit them like dresses. I was an XL.  They knew this.  I remember wanting to do nothing but eat a whole container of cookies after they left I was so angry. I remember eating the cookies.

    I have been thin. I have been fat. I remember under eating or eating nothing. I remember telling my parents I was practicing "portion control." I remember binge eating during finals week my Junior year of college, avoiding studying, watching Dawson's Creek, and crying about how messed up my idea of self was. How I didn't know who I was or how I'd ever be happy.

    I remember last summer at 24, having my husband take photos of me in my cute outfits, because I happened to one day come across a post of someone who looked like me with the hashtag "body positivity." I remember finally not being angry at my body anymore. I remember learning to stop hating myself. I remember my journey. It's important not to forget. I am so glad that I finally realized after more than half of my life that you can't hate yourself into loving yourself.

Thanks for reading,

Stacy

What Body Positivity Means to Me

    Finding body positivity, for me, was like finding a best friend hiding around the corner who had been living in the house tucked down the street my whole life that I didn't even know existed.  Except, that friend was me in disguise. She was in plain sight the whole time. I just had to wake up from my dreamy daze and look her in the eyes. And I have finally accepted her, my body, as a beautiful part of myself. Body positivity and being at peace with one's self means something different for everyone. I have only come to realize recently --in the last day-- after speaking with a friend that body positivity can have two vastly different interpretations --and probably many more-- depending on the person.

    Last night, I was puzzled by a post online that I saw on a friend's Facebook. This friend is a woman that I respect, and I admire as a mother and as woman in general. She had posted something that was in favor of altering her body to appear thinner in order to feel better about herself  --I am avoiding specific details as not to single her out, because I respect her. This troubled me, as I am a body positivity advocate, and I turned to a trusted fellow female friend with a very pointed  --and I now see, judgmental-- question: Why are people so hell bent on changing their bodies instead of loving them?  She had the most eye opening and accepting response for me.

    She sent me this video to the song "Most Girls" by Hailee Steinfeld:

Art by me, Stacy Hall, lyrics from "Most Girls"

    This song hit me like a slap in the face. I came to the realization that body positivity is not just about accepting your body for how it is right now, but it is, more importantly, about loving yourself overall. If  you love yourself right now as you are, then that is awesome, and I am so glad that you have started your body positivity journey.  If you don't, then work toward that love in your own way. In your own time. A way that isn't destructive to your body or mental health, but rather in a way that makes you feel good. If that means changing or altering your body to make yourself feel better, then change away, girl! As long as you are doing it in a healthy way, then who am I to judge? Who is anyone to judge? This may seem like a simple revelation and a very obvious one to some, but as a feminist who is still developing and as an advocate, I am learning and trying to unlearn the ideals pushed on me by society every day. 

You can buy this awesome pin here

    Before last night, I saw body positivity as a one way street. The song "Scars to Your Beautiful" by Alessia Cara was a good interpretation of my views toward it previously. But, now I see body positivity as a two lane highway. You just have to pick your lane and drive down your own path paving the way as you go. Pick your lane, or your team if you will. Love yourself as you are now, or work toward it in your own way. Whichever team you pick, I am here to offer you support and hopefully learn from your experiences. That is what is so beautiful about life--if we open our ears, eyes, minds, and hearts, then we can continually learn from one another by educating each other. Thank you, kind friend for broadening my world view. You kick ass, and your girls supporting girls attitude is so powerful and influential! 

Thanks for reading,

Stacy 

Let Her Walk

    An issue that is plaguing our public schools in the U.S. and across the world is teen pregnancy. In the media, teen pregnancy has become glamorized with shows like Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant. As a mom, who has been pregnant twice and blessed with three boys, I can tell you there is nothing glamorous about pregnancy. You gain weight that can make you feel sluggish, you have to pee like crazy, your skin develops weird patches, hair grows where you previously didn't have hair, and to top it all off you vomit around the clock in the beginning unless you're lucky. Pregnancy is hard. For me, it has even been life threatening. I can't imagine having to deal with this at such a young age. But, for Maddi Runkles and many teens like her, this is now a reality. We have to prevent teen pregnancy from happening not because it is wrong for teens to have sex, but because it is hard to be a parent at any age. It is even harder when you are still a kid yourself. We need more comprehensive sex education in our public schools to prevent situations like that of Maddi's. And, to prevent the shame centered around it, the injustices that result from teen pregnancy, and the stereotype that it is wrong for teens to want and to have sex.

Safe sex is always necessary!

    Maddi Runkles had sex before marriage as reported by The Washington Post in Joe Heim's article "Teen Banned from Graduation ‘Not Because She Is Pregnant but Because She Was Immoral’". This is a decision that many teens today choose to make, myself included when I was a teen. Maddi is now pregnant and is having her baby in 3 months at the age of 18 years old. Her school tried to expel her, shut her out, made a public post on their website about the "love" that they are giving her through "discipline," and they are now keeping her from walking at her high school graduation. An achievement that was well earned by Maddi. She was a 4.0 student who served as student council president until she became pregnant. Why should this student not get to celebrate her achievement or hold office in her school, because she chose to have sex? I had sex before graduating high school, and the Center for Disease Control (CDC) reported in 2015 that 41% of teens were having sex ("Sexual Risk Behaviors: HIV, STD, & Teen Pregnancy Prevention"). These were the numbers released on the teens surveyed that were honest and felt comfortable disclosing this personal information. That does not mean that these numbers are not higher. Having sex is a personal choice, and it seems that there are only further consequences for teens who choose to engage in this behavior if it results in pregnancy. As long as teens are being safe (by using oral contraceptives or condoms), consenting, legal, and overall responsible, then it is really none of our business what they are doing in their free time. 

Always use some kind of contraceptive!

    The issue in Maddi's case is that she DID get pregnant. She was not offered sex education in high school, but she was taught abstinence only. Comprehensive sex education is absolutely necessary in our public schools to prevent teen pregnancy. Comprehensive sex education is defined as the following by The Future of Sex Education's website: "The comprehensive sexuality education curriculum should include a variety of topics including anatomy, physiology, families, personal safety, healthy relationships, pregnancy and birth, sexually transmitted diseases including HIV, contraceptives, sexual orientation, pregnancy options, media literacy and more. It should be medically accurate. Qualified, trained teachers should provide sexuality education" ("Definition of Comprehensive Sex Education"). This type of sex education should be in every school district in the U.S. However, it was only offered in 11 of our states in the U.S as reported in an article published by The Public Library of Science in 2011 entitled "Abstinence-Only Education and Teen Pregnancy Rates: Why We Need Comprehensive Sex Education in the U.S." written by Kathrin Stranger Hall and David Hall (4).  In fact the results of the study conclude that, "teens in states that prescribe more abstinence education are actually more likely to become pregnant..." as we see in Maddi Runkles case (4).  Comprehensive sex education works, and we NEED to include it in EVERY public school. 

16 and Pregnant is skewing how teens view pregnancy.

    With shows like Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant glamorizing the lifestyle of teen parents by throwing money at the girls that they cast, it is no wonder why girls are getting pregnant at alarming rates. Let's not throw money at this issue in this way! Let's throw some money at comprehensive sex education in our public schools. Teens need to be educated on consent and safe sex. They need this education to take into their adult lives, so we can prevent unwanted pregnancy, sexual assault,sexually transmitted diseases and infections,etc. --not saying that this education will end these issues, but it will help to ensure our students and teens have been equipped with the education to prevent these things from occurring. 

God has more to do, trust me.

    In Maddi's case, her school is very religious. Her administrators feel that she has committed an egregious sin that should be made into an example. I really think God has more to worry about than this poor girl having sex before marriage. Let her walk. I had sex before marriage, was safe, and did so with consent on both sides. I don't think God views me any differently, and I don't think he views this girl differently for getting pregnant at 18. If we don't want teens getting pregnant, then we need to have better resources for them that include readily accessible information on safe sex practices as well as contraceptives. 

    It is not shameful to have sex. If we were to make an active decision to talk about this more with our children and actually educate them, then maybe we could enact some change. Maybe we could change the mind of older generations that want to persecute teens for making these decisions. We are all sexual beings and there should be no shame in that. Maddi should be allowed to walk at her graduation. She has done nothing wrong. Let. Her. Walk.  

Thanks for reading,

Stacy

Works Cited

"Definition of Comprehensive Sex Education." Futureofsexed.org. Advocates for Youth, n.d. Web. 25 May 2017.

Heim, Joe. "Christian School: Teen Banned from Graduation 'not Because She Is Pregnant but Because She Was Immoral'." The Washington Post. WP Company, 24 May 2017. Web. 25 May 2017.

"Sexual Risk Behaviors: HIV, STD, & Teen Pregnancy Prevention." Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 10 Mar. 2017. Web. 25 May 2017.

Stanger-Hall, Kathrin F., and David W. Hall. "Abstinence-Only Education and Teen Pregnancy Rates: Why We Need Comprehensive Sex Education in the U.S." PLoS ONE 6.10 (2011): 3-4. Google Scholar. Web. 25 May 2017.

Shoulders are NOT Sexual

    As a teacher, once female student, and someone who has struggled with her body image since 8 years old, dress codes infuriate me. Young women -- and young men, though this post will primarily focus on young women--  should be able to express themselves through their fashion without being made to feel shame or being told that they're "a distraction." Shoulders are not sexual. Legs are not sexual. Female skin is not sexual just, because it is shown. Our patriarchal society and print media perpetrate these outdated ideals. Male students who are "tempted" by these things have serious issues if these temptations are so all consuming that they cannot focus on their work, and I don't know that I want them in class with my female students. Why is the girl punished in these situations?  Why is she made to feel shame when she isn't the one with problem?  She is just existing. We aren't responsible for how other people perceive us. Those are personal issues of the individuals doing the perceiving.

     

 

 








    I have seen a few videos of young women speaking about their experiences with public schools' outdated dress codes recently. The first video discusses the story of a high school senior named Summer. She is an honor roll student with a full ride scholarship on the line. She has been persecuted for wearing a shirt. SHE WAS ALMOST ARRESTED OVER A SHIRT! A non revealing shirt--not that it should matter-- at that. Tell me why this student's diploma and pursuit of higher education should be on the line because of a shirt? How is this okay? Our schools DO NOT have their priorities straight. Our students' education and productive learning experiences are paramount above ALL else. When we start to make schools rigid environments for female students to express themselves and to feel comfortable, then we are failing. We are failing them. We have to do better.

    This second video tells the story of another female student who was sent home for baring her shoulders. Her circumstances are different than that of Summer's. This student was wearing a strapless dress to school, because the school's air conditioning was out. She was hot, and she wanted to be comfortable. Who in their right mind can argue with her logic? She was hot. She was dressing for the circumstances in which she was being forced to

learn: Teen Sent Home for Strapless Dress

.

All of our bodies deserve respect.  All bodies are good bodies.

    In my personal experience teaching, I have had male students tell other female students, "You look sexual today." My response went something like this, "Excuse me? I am sorry, WHAT did you just say? Did you just make a very sexist comment that could be construed as harassment if you were in a place of work or a public space? I think you did. That is unacceptable, and you need to apologize and treat your female peers with respect." It is completely ridiculous that I have to tell male students this. That I have to make examples of them in my classroom. A CLASSROOM that is supposed to be a safe space and productive learning environment for all. Where we are supposed to practice tolerance and respect. We need to teach young men how to stop sexualizing young girls and women. On top of that, we need more comprehensive sexual education in our public schools--especially in Oklahoma where it isn't even required.

High School

   As a high school student, I typically looked like this: 

  There is NOTHING wrong with this. I wanted to look this way. I was never sent home for it, and this picture shows overtly sexualized body parts, my breasts, as opposed to shoulders that are not even remotely sexual.

    Our public schools better get it together, because young women are educated about feminist issues today, unlike myself at their age. And I promise they won't be silent, public schools of America and the world. The future is female. They are coming for you. 

Art by Kimothy Joy--one of my favorite female artists of the moment

Thanks for reading,

Stacy