An issue that is plaguing our public schools in the U.S. and across the world is teen pregnancy. In the media, teen pregnancy has become glamorized with shows like Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant. As a mom, who has been pregnant twice and blessed with three boys, I can tell you there is nothing glamorous about pregnancy. You gain weight that can make you feel sluggish, you have to pee like crazy, your skin develops weird patches, hair grows where you previously didn't have hair, and to top it all off you vomit around the clock in the beginning unless you're lucky. Pregnancy is hard. For me, it has even been life threatening. I can't imagine having to deal with this at such a young age. But, for Maddi Runkles and many teens like her, this is now a reality. We have to prevent teen pregnancy from happening not because it is wrong for teens to have sex, but because it is hard to be a parent at any age. It is even harder when you are still a kid yourself. We need more comprehensive sex education in our public schools to prevent situations like that of Maddi's. And, to prevent the shame centered around it, the injustices that result from teen pregnancy, and the stereotype that it is wrong for teens to want and to have sex.
Safe sex is always necessary!
Maddi Runkles had sex before marriage as reported by The Washington Post in Joe Heim's article "Teen Banned from Graduation ‘Not Because She Is Pregnant but Because She Was Immoral’". This is a decision that many teens today choose to make, myself included when I was a teen. Maddi is now pregnant and is having her baby in 3 months at the age of 18 years old. Her school tried to expel her, shut her out, made a public post on their website about the "love" that they are giving her through "discipline," and they are now keeping her from walking at her high school graduation. An achievement that was well earned by Maddi. She was a 4.0 student who served as student council president until she became pregnant. Why should this student not get to celebrate her achievement or hold office in her school, because she chose to have sex? I had sex before graduating high school, and the Center for Disease Control (CDC) reported in 2015 that 41% of teens were having sex ("Sexual Risk Behaviors: HIV, STD, & Teen Pregnancy Prevention"). These were the numbers released on the teens surveyed that were honest and felt comfortable disclosing this personal information. That does not mean that these numbers are not higher. Having sex is a personal choice, and it seems that there are only further consequences for teens who choose to engage in this behavior if it results in pregnancy. As long as teens are being safe (by using oral contraceptives or condoms), consenting, legal, and overall responsible, then it is really none of our business what they are doing in their free time.
Always use some kind of contraceptive!
The issue in Maddi's case is that she DID get pregnant. She was not offered sex education in high school, but she was taught abstinence only. Comprehensive sex education is absolutely necessary in our public schools to prevent teen pregnancy. Comprehensive sex education is defined as the following by The Future of Sex Education'swebsite: "The comprehensive sexuality education curriculum should include a variety of topics including anatomy, physiology, families, personal safety, healthy relationships, pregnancy and birth, sexually transmitted diseases including HIV, contraceptives, sexual orientation, pregnancy options, media literacy and more. It should be medically accurate. Qualified, trained teachers should provide sexuality education" ("Definition of Comprehensive Sex Education"). This type of sex education should be in every school district in the U.S. However, it was only offered in 11 of our states in the U.S as reported in an article published by The Public Library of Science in 2011 entitled"Abstinence-Only Education and Teen Pregnancy Rates: Why We Need Comprehensive Sex Education in the U.S."written by Kathrin Stranger Hall and David Hall (4). In fact the results of the study conclude that, "teens in states that prescribe more abstinence education are actually more likely to become pregnant..." as we see in Maddi Runkles case (4). Comprehensive sex education works, and we NEED to include it in EVERY public school.
16 and Pregnant is skewing how teens view pregnancy.
With shows like Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant glamorizing the lifestyle of teen parents by throwing money at the girls that they cast, it is no wonder why girls are getting pregnant at alarming rates. Let's not throw money at this issue in this way! Let's throw some money at comprehensive sex education in our public schools. Teens need to be educated on consent and safe sex. They need this education to take into their adult lives, so we can prevent unwanted pregnancy, sexual assault,sexually transmitted diseases and infections,etc. --not saying that this education will end these issues, but it will help to ensure our students and teens have been equipped with the education to prevent these things from occurring.
God has more to do, trust me.
In Maddi's case, her school is very religious. Her administrators feel that she has committed an egregious sin that should be made into an example. I really think God has more to worry about than this poor girl having sex before marriage. Let her walk. I had sex before marriage, was safe, and did so with consent on both sides. I don't think God views me any differently, and I don't think he views this girl differently for getting pregnant at 18. If we don't want teens getting pregnant, then we need to have better resources for them that include readily accessible information on safe sex practices as well as contraceptives.
It is not shameful to have sex. If we were to make an active decision to talk about this more with our children and actually educate them, then maybe we could enact some change. Maybe we could change the mind of older generations that want to persecute teens for making these decisions. We are all sexual beings and there should be no shame in that. Maddi should be allowed to walk at her graduation. She has done nothing wrong. Let. Her. Walk.
Thanks for reading,
Stacy
Works Cited
"Definition of Comprehensive Sex Education." Futureofsexed.org. Advocates for Youth, n.d. Web. 25 May 2017.
Heim, Joe. "Christian School: Teen Banned from Graduation 'not Because She Is Pregnant but Because She Was Immoral'." The Washington Post. WP Company, 24 May 2017. Web. 25 May 2017.
"Sexual Risk Behaviors: HIV, STD, & Teen Pregnancy Prevention." Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 10 Mar. 2017. Web. 25 May 2017.
Stanger-Hall, Kathrin F., and David W. Hall. "Abstinence-Only Education and Teen Pregnancy Rates: Why We Need Comprehensive Sex Education in the U.S." PLoS ONE 6.10 (2011): 3-4. Google Scholar. Web. 25 May 2017.
Have you ever been asked if you speak Spanish? Have you ever been asked, what are you? Where are you really from? Have you ever been made to feel less than because of the color of your skin? If you answered no to most of these, then you may look or be white. It's okay to not have experienced these injustices, but it is not okay and never will it be okay for you to allow them to continue to happen to persons of color (POC). The racial divide in the United States is increasing by the day, the hour, the second. I am a POC and someone who has faced racist, discriminatory, and bigoted comments from people my entire life.
Let's talk about something that happened recently. The racist incident in this video. If you have not watched the video, then I ask that you do. Everyone needs to see this. It is disgusting and horrible, but it NEEDS to be seen. The irate man in the video, Mike, spouts racial slurs at Mr. Torres for talking in Spanish to his mom on the phone. His mother is a Puerto Rican American, and her first language is Spanish (it isn't revealed if she herself speaks English like her son). Throughout the video, Mr.Torres attempts to have conversation with Mike. He attempts to appeal to him and relate to him, befriend him if you will. Instances like these fill me with anger and rage. I can say for certain that I wouldn't have handled this situation with as much grace and composure as he did. It makes me sad like Mr. Torres stated in the video. I feel sad for Mike. And people like him. And for people who don't see how wrong Mike is. We can't let people like Mike speak to others this way. We can't tolerate this in America or any part of the world.
Try to not push people away if you don't agree.
I beg of you. Try to understand them instead.
If you cant, investigate.
I referred to the world as a collage in my last post, and the U.S. is commonly referred to as a melting pot. We are a diverse group of people made up of different skin tones, backgrounds, cultures, etc. When did we lose this identity? Why is our country so afraid to discuss race? Why do people say they don't see race or that it doesn't matter? Race matters. It is part of our identity as individuals, as a country. When you say it doesn't matter, you are stripping the identity of people away--of your country away.
We have to keep talking, keep learning, keep striving for understanding, keep educating each other. We must practice tolerance, but we must meet intolerance with resistance. We MUST keep resisting racist and discriminatory ideals. We must unite as country.
On a related note, my husband sent me a link to this page last night:
This page spreads hate. It is egregious. It is run by racist white people for white people. Their mission is to keep the white race alive. They believe that if white people have children with people outside of their race that they are infecting the purity of the white race. According to this page, my children would be considered "mud." How are we still allowing this type of hate speech to exist? If you feel so inclined, report this page as it violates Facebook's community guidelines (I have embedded the link into the caption). I hope that you would report it for its message and pure hatred first and foremost.
This video and this page have prompted reflection of my personal experiences. As I have stated before, I have benefited from white privilege, because I am a white person. But, I am also Hispanic. I have experienced several instances of discrimination because of my maiden name, Espinosa, and my appearance.
Once during an interview, the principal of a school asked me if I spoke Spanish fluently. Not only is it illegal to ask this during an interview, but it is downright ignorant and discriminatory to assume so. I insisted to this man that I did not speak Spanish fluently and neither does anyone in my family. --I have taken many classes as I do wish to speak it fluently one day, but I digress.-- This principal kept insisting that someone in my family must speak it. He wouldn't give it up. Needless to say when he offered me the job three times over the course of the next week, I declined each time.
Another instance that comes to mind happened on a typical morning drive to my first teaching job. I was driving through a tiny town that is notorious for being a speed trap in Oklahoma right as the sun started to peek over the horizon of the purply pink sky.
As I was driving my tiny blue green Chevy Cobalt out of this speed trap of a town, I started to apply pressure to the gas peddle to get up to 50 mph. The speed was supposed to change from 40 mph to 50 mph in less than half of a mile. --Something you should know about me is that I always wear a seat belt, I never text and drive, and if I need to make a phone call I will pull over. In other words, I am typically very cautious while driving.-- As you have probably already guessed, I was soon pulled over by one of the town's officers for speeding.
As the officer approached my window, my heart started to thump with ferocity. I had never been stopped before, and I was unsure of what was about to happen. What happened next was uncomfortable to say the least. The officer asked for my license and insurance verification which I promptly gave him. Then, he said he would run my plates back in his vehicle. Once he came back, he said, "So, your last name's Espinosa, huh?" I replied with, "Yes, sir." He then asked where I was from, and I told him the name of my hometown and where I currently lived at the time. He then said, "No, where are you REALLY from?" This made my skin shiver. What did he mean? I had never been asked this before. I was shocked. So, I repeated again the name of my hometown and added that I had lived there my entire life until college. He looked at me with a puzzled expression like he didn't quite believe me. He asked me where I was headed, and I told him that I was headed to my job in the next town at the high school to teach my 10th and 11th grade students. He said he would have to write me a ticket for speeding which was completely justified. However, the ticket ended up costing me $300. Why? Why was it so much when I had never had any other traffic violations, and I was only going 10 mph over the speed limit? You tell me.
If you are a POC, speak and give yourself a voice. If you are
not, then I urge you to be an ally and offer support in any
way you can.
Now, I know that these experiences are not the worst instances of prejudice and discrimination--not that this is a competition. The last one is debatable. You could read through my encounter and think that it's not completely prejudice if at all, and that I was in the wrong. I was in the wrong. I should not have been speeding and should have received a ticket for doing so. The officer was also in the wrong. The way that the question about my place of origin was inflected and insisted upon as if I was lying about where I am from leads me to believe there was more to his question. That he was insinuating something else.
Whether people are outright discriminatory, racist, or prejudice, are one of these without meaning to be, or they idly stand by when someone else is acting in one of these ways, it's wrong. This must stop. We have to keep actively pursuing justice by writing, by talking, by protesting, by reaching out to one another --by taking action.
Thanks for reading,
It is not shameful to have sex. If we were to make an active decision to talk about this more with our children and actually educate them, then maybe we could enact some change. Maybe we could change the mind of older generations that want to persecute teens for making these decisions. We are all sexual beings and there should be no shame in that. Maddi should be allowed to walk at her graduation. She has done nothing wrong. Let. Her. Walk. 
